How to Write an Excellent Wedding Toast

How to Write an Excellent Wedding Toast

A wedding is a joyous celebration of love. It is one of the happiest days of your life. Unfortunately though, as any bride or groom will tell you, the big day often comes with high levels of stress.

One of the last things any bride or groom should have to worry about is the wedding toasts. If you have been given the tremendous honor of giving a toast at your family or friend’s wedding, don’t panic.

We are here with a few tips and tricks on how to write a wedding toast the happy couple will love. With a little work and a lot of love, your wedding toast can be one of the highlights of the happy couple’s big day. 

When the time comes to plan your big day, contact Adagio Djay Entertainment. Take the stress out of at least one aspect of your wedding day and hire the best in wedding entertainment. Generally, they will also be providing a microphone for toasts, so you want someone experienced with audio who has up-to-date equipment so your toasts are heard.

Now that you have the music and audio covered, let’s get back to that speech. Writing an excellent wedding toast is not as scary as it may seem. Follow these few simple guidelines, and your toast will strike that perfect balance between touching, uplifting, and memorable. 

man giving speech at wedding

Know Your Audience

…and make sure they know you.

It is unlikely that you are intimate with every single person in the room. Provide the guests with a quick introduction, but remember, it’s not about you! All these people are here because they care about the bride and the groom, not to listen to you talk about yourself. Start by telling the crowd who you are and your connection to the couple. 

If you have a good story or amusing anecdote about how you met the bride or groom, try to work it in. Remember, though, keep it short. The introduction of your speech should be short and sweet.

Plan it Out, Tell a Story

When it comes to public speaking, winging it is never a good option. Unless you are a regular public speaker, keep in mind that nerves often get the better of inexperienced orators. 

The best way to combat a bad case of nerves is to have a plan. If you are having trouble getting started, the best thing to do is to simply put pen to paper. Think about your favorite memories with the bride, groom, or both and write them down. 

You never know where inspiration will strike. A sweet memory can lead to an even sweeter story, and before you know it, you are halfway there. 

You should only use this stream of consciousness as a starting point. For a speech to be successful, it must have a theme. 

Pick an attribute that you admire in either the bride or the groom. Choose stories that prove that point. Try to tie all the threads of your speech to that one attribute and don’t stray too far. 

Remember, you are here to highlight the bride and groom. You want the two of them, and every one of their guests, to feel good. Leave them with a few touching words and a lasting memory.  It’s a hefty responsibility to be sure, but the bride and groom trusted you enough to select you for this honor.

Mr and Mrs sign at reception

Play to Your Strengths 

Don’t try to be something you are not. If you are not comfortable with telling jokes, don’t try to force laughs into your toast.

If your motivation is to make people like you, not the bride and groom, your toast may come off as inauthentic. People will be able to tell that you are up there speaking to them for all the wrong reasons. More importantly, so will the bride and groom.

Remember that the bride and groom, your good friends, will remember the words you say in your toast for the rest of their lives. Be memorable for all the right reasons. 

Keep it Short

Try to aim for three to five minutes. Anything longer than that and you risk boring everyone. Three minutes is plenty of time to say everything you need to say. 

If you are a fast talker, remind yourself to speak slowly and enunciate. It will be a real tragedy if you write a sweet and touching speech which no one can understand because you speed through it.

table decorations at wedding reception

Practice Makes Perfect

Write your speech down or type and print it out. Read it out loud, not just to yourself in your head, and time yourself. Remember that your nerves will likely push you to speak faster than your usual calm voice.

Don’t feel like you have to memorize your toast. No one will expect it, and your nerves may take over and force the words from your head. Read from the same note cards you used to practice. You will feel more confident knowing you prepared for this. 

If you find yourself getting nervous, leading up to the big day, try to remember that this reaction is normal. One trick public speakers often use when they feel the nerves taking over is to tell yourself you are excited instead.

Have you ever heard the expression, “Fake it ‘til you make it?” Even if you don’t feel confident, act like you are. Chances are, no one will know the difference. The appearance of confidence will seem like real confidence to everyone else. 

A Few Don’ts

  • NEVER give a wedding toast when you are drunk. The bride and groom will not thank you, and, more than likely, you will end up embarrassing yourself and the not-so-happy couple.
  • Don’t rely on your phone instead of printed or written notecards. Technology has a tendency to fail. Inevitably, the middle of your toast will be one of those times.
  • Don’t be crass. You are in mixed company, speaking to children and grandparents. Show the proper respect. 
  • Don’t mention money.
  • Don’t talk about past relationships or marriages.
  • Don’t make any suggestive honeymoon jokes.


  • Prepare. Reading this shows that you’re thinking about your toast ahead of time and that’s a good start. Be sure to follow up with the actual preparation and put some thought into what you say.
  • Speak loudly and clearing into the microphone. Although you may feel loud to yourself, the DJ will monitor volume and most newer speakers will naturally err on the side of too quiet than too loud. 
  • End on a high note. Raise your glass and ask the assembled guests to join you in toasting the bride and groom.
  • Expect to be nervous. Speaking in public can be intimidating. Try to accept the fact that this is a natural reaction, and don’t punish yourself for feeling nervous. 
  • Remember that this is only a few minutes of your life. Remind yourself that you are not doing this for you, but for two people you love. Think about the two of them and the love they share, and hopefully, you will forget your fear. 

bride and groom at reception

For those of you who have been bestowed with the honor of the top place in the wedding party, check out these tips to be the best Best Man or Maid of Honor you can be. A great wedding toast is only one part of a happy and successful wedding day. 

At Adagio Djay Entertainment, we know how important your wedding day is. Contact us today and see what we can do for you. Let us help you make memories that will last a lifetime.

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